Today is a gift!

I just watched Kung Fu Panda yesterday and loved it. What I loved was it was funny, silly, and philosophical at the same time.

I laughed out loud so many times and there were some great deep moments. Here are two of my favorite sayings from the movie.

1. "Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, and Today is a gift. That's why it's called the present." It's so simple yet so difficult to achieve. Most of the time we are so worried about the future or thinking about what had happened in the past that we forget to be present at the current moment. This saying inspires me to treasure every moment with Isabel, with Jaime, with my family, and my friends and to stop worrying so much about what has happened or what may happen. Just enjoying life on the roller-coaster!

2. "There is no secret ingredient." Again, so simple yet profound. All we need is to believe in ourself and our abilities and extraordinary things happen. This is why I love Buddhist philosophy so much. It's simple to understand but take years to practice. As I find my footing as a new mom, I had moments of doubt of whether I can be a good mom. I begin to also care too much about what others think of me as a mom. Now I realize I judge myself too harshly as I sometime do others. It's important to go with the flow of life - experience happy moments, welcome challenging ones and have some mercy on myself. There is no secret ingredient to being a good mom or leading a happy life. I just have to believe and the rest will work itself out. :-)

- Lei

Do I have to grow up now?

I had morning sickness; My tummy is growing daily; so I know I am pregnant and will be soon a mom. Once in awhile, however, it just seems all so surreal. Where did all the time go? Am I really ready to be mommy. Nobody is ever ready I guess. Once in awhile, I would look at Jaime and still say "we are married?" "I am pregnant?" as if it's happening to someone else or it's all a dream.

A small part of me misses the old days of going out, going on trips with girlfriends, being very care free. I keep hearing from friends with kids - "sleep now because you won't get any your first year. or go to the movies now because you will never finish one once you have kids. So daunting and scary... A small part of me wish I was still a kid. Another part of me think we will be different - somehow we will be super parents who can take care of our kid and have some fun too. I can still hope, right?

I always remember that when i was a kid and was so eager to grow up, many adults told me "savor your childhood - it's the most happy and low stress time of your life" Now I get what they mean.. I guess it's all part of the life journey...This is a major life change, I suppose. I look forward to it with much anticipation, excitement, and nervousness. I guess they wouldn't call it life if everything is predictable.

On second thought, I would probably lament if I wasn't pregnant or married now. I guess I am human with fickle thoughts and worries. Part of the journey of becoming a mommy...

-Lei