Employee of the Month

So I'm thinking that the wife should get a raise for all of the hours she's putting in. They say that the baby needs to feed every two hours and by my calculations that means the wife is putting in 12 hours a day 7 days a week which amounts to 84 hours a week around the clock. This doesn't include the times when the little one feeds every hour. Yes, she definitely deserves a raise. So now I'll take it up with my boss and push for it. Ironically, that would be the same person who I'd be pushing to give the raise to. Oh well, so goes life. It's the thought that counts I guess.

- Jaime

Funny photo of Isabel

I laugh every time I see this photo I took of Isabel a few days ago. I guess because she can only see a few inches in front of her, she can look cross-eyed like this photo. So funny...

I am not worried as I read in my baby books, infants do that when they are still developing their eyes. It's not a permanent condition. I certainly hope not! Doesn't it just make you laugh?

- Lei

Taking Care of Isabel - A Three Person Job

Everyone says that having a new baby changes your life and takes a lot of work. Well, they are right! While Isabel is adorable and gaining weight well, it really does take all three of us (my mom, Jaime, and I) to take care of her 24/7.

I fell really lucky that Jaime's job has flexibility for him to work full time with part of it from home and my mom can be in town for this month to help me recover and take care of the baby. Jaime's parents will be in town next month, which is great as well. After that, hopefully, we will get the hang of it to do it by ourselves.

So why does a new baby take so much work? well, here is a breakdown for all those interested.
- Breastfeeding: I am the only one who can do this for now until I pump milk, so it takes me anywhere from 8 -12 hours to feed her. But I do need help when I feed her as I am still healing. Either mom or Jaime would position her for me each time once I sit down with the Boppy pillow.
- Burping Isabel: This is a lot harder than we thought. Jaime is the champion at this and mom and I burp her when he is at work. We burp her after she eats on each side and sometime it takes a good 5-10 min and she still may not burp. We try our best since if she doesn't burp, she is likely to choke a little or spit up milk.
- Changing Diapers: Jaime and my mom usually do this, so I can take a break
- Bathing Isabel: We only give her sponge bath now since her umbilical cord hasn't fallen off. Mom and I do this once a day during the day. Every few days, Jaime and I will wash her hair.
- Soothing Isabel: Between feedings, Isabel would get fussy if she is not sleepy and all three of us rotate to sooth her. Jaime is great at doing this right before her first night sleep. My mom would hum melodies to her, walk her around the apt, cradle her, and talk to her throughout the day as needed. Once or twice a day, I will cradle her after a feeding and let her sleep on me for an hour or walk her or hum to her. It really helps that Jaime and mom help with this as it can get really draining on any one person
- Night shift: Jaime and mom rotate to help me so they can try to get a longer stretch of sleep and I get up each time - usually 2-3 times at night to feed her. I am getting used to it now and actually wake up after every 2-3 hour of sleep naturally. Go figure
- Food for all of us: My mom cooks fresh food for me everyday to help with my milk supply. This includes organic chicken or pork soup, porridges, noodles, fresh vegetables, etc... My milk supply is wonderful for Isabel as a result. Jaime helps get us food from the outside when we need a change from Chinese food (such as Italian, burger, hawaiian, take out chinese, etc)
- Getting baby supply: Jaime goes out every few days to Target or Babies r us for supplies like wash cloth, diapers, bras, swaddle blankets.
- Pediatrician visit: Jaime should get the "husband of the year award" for this. He has taken Isabel to Dr. Langston/ Dr. Simon twice now BY HIMSELF. This included driving her, undressing her and dressing her at the office, changing her diaper, and soothing her. Even the office was amazed he has done this by himself. This really gives me and my mom time to catch a nap at home. He has been so thoughtful to let us do that. Thanks so much, honey!
- Housework: Jaime organizes everything in the house everyday including making the bed. Mom hand washes some of Isabel's soiled laundry every day and does my and hers downstairs every other day.

I think that covers it. We are getting more of a good routine down day after day. Yesterday, Isabel slept for 4 hours, 2 hours, and 2 hours at night which was great. I actually got 7 hours of sleep in 3 segments!

- Lei

23 Pounds To Go!

I gained almost 40 pounds for Isabel and lost 10 after giving birth. I am happy to say I lost another 7 pounds in the last 2 weeks. Yeepy.

23 pounds to go before I return to my pre-pregnancy weight. That's the good news. The bad news is my OB, who had two kids, and look fabulous now took 8 months each time to lose the weight.

So I am not expecting to lose the 23 pounds quickly. We'll see. My OB say my uterus is still shrinking and that will take time. I think breastfeeding is really helping with that and the weight loss. I will keep you posted.

For now, the good news is my $500 investment in pregnancy clothes will get more mileage for probably another 6 months.

- Lei

"The Nipple/Areola Monalogue"

I know 100% of moms know what an Areola is. What about the rest of you? Well, the painting on the right should give you a good hint ;-)

Once I had Isabel, my views about my breasts and nipples changed completely and I am now fully introduced to my Areola (the brown part around the nipple), which I never paid much attention before.

Breastfeeding now dominates my world. My breasts, nipples, and areola have become the perfect food delivering mechanism for Isabel and had to go through a complete transformation as well. From a a 36B, I am now a ful 40D. You would think I would rejoice and I guess part of me does, although I know it will be short-lived. After I stop breastfeeding, they are supposed to shrink to a size smaller than 36B :-(.

The transformation is not so easy as just getting bigger. First week of breastfeeding was very trying. Now I understand why some moms give up. The baby must latch onto the areola in order to stimulate milk supply and avoid hurting me. Well, as you would imagine, a new baby does not quite know that and while Isabel seems all cute and fragile. She, as all new borns, have a jaw of steels and was literally chumping on my nipples until I learned how she can latch on correctly to feed. The result: stabbing pain to the heart when she feeds in the first week which was about 8-10 a day, as she accidentally cut up my nipples a bit while experimenting and learning the latch.

They say that breastfeeding sometime is more painful than birth. I may disagree given my birth experience but the pain for breastfeeding at first was definitely substantial. I was torn between wanting to stop and being happy that she is feeding on me as long as possible.

Luckily, the damage she caused in the first week healed by itself after 10 days as I continued with her and took deep breaths through the pain. Now my nipples are trained to take some bruising without bleeding or tearing and Isabel knows to suck on the areola part to get the most milk - the miracle of human creation. I was also lucky so far to avoid painful engorgement issues as I learned to massage my breast during feeding to avoid clogging up my milk ducts.

So, from being the object of admiration, my breasts are now the lifeline and nutrition center for Isabel and the areola is center of all the action. Welcome to my world!

-Lei

The Ever Changing Isabel

I see Isabel every hour and still I see changes in her. She just turned two weeks and already so many milestones have happened
- She opened her eyes in the first day and they are getting bigger every day.
- She started having the eyelid folds on day 3 as well as starting growing eyelashes in week 2
- She regained her birth weight by day 10 instead of day 14 which is more typical and is definitely getting more baby fat
- She slept 5 hours one night. Too bad it is not a routine yet, but I think she knows the difference between day and night already. She is more likely to sleep 2 or 3 hours at night and only about an hour during the day, but again it's not routine. Right now, she is still asleep for 2+ hours and it's day time. C'est la vie
- She started smiling a little in her sleep on day 3 and is smiling a bit more everyday just randomly
- Just today, she was able to turn herself sideways on the bed and sleep sideways. It seems really early that she can do that. We have to really watch out for her so she sleeps safely.

We are treasuring every moments. I cannot get enough of looking at her face and kissing her chubby little feet :-).

- Lei

The "Fourth Trimester"

With so much excitement with a new baby, a new mom often forgets about herself and the incredible change the body is still going through after birth, which I call the "fourth trimester". I think I was also hoping that somehow my body would miraculously just go back to my pre-pregnancy shape in no time.

Well, reality is a little different. Here are what I am experiencing in the "fourth trimester" as a new mom
- I gain almost 40 pounds during pregnancy and lost only about 10 pounds after birth (7.5 pounds of Isabel and the rest are the placenta and fluids): so literally, I still looked 6 months pregnant. I hear it takes about another 9 months to lose the baby wait
- I have the "baby blues" due to hormone roller coasters that happens to every mom after birth, so I would cry for no reason or all of a sudden. Luckily my mom and Jaime have been very supportive when it happens
- I use to sleep 8-10 hours a night, now I am happy if I can get 2-3 hours of sleep at a time
- Hormones makes me sweat every time I sleep and soak my t-shirt. good thing I have over 25 t-shirts to wear. I go through 4 or 5 a day
- my day is completely filled with breastfeeding: Isabel feeds every 2-3 hours. You would think that's should gave us plenty of time, but not when the breastfeeding, burping, diaper changing each time take almost 90 min each time. This means it actual only leaves about 30 min - 90 min or so for eating, sleeping, showering, etc for myself before the whole cycle start again.
- I eat about 6 times a day and sometimes get instantly hungry after feeding. I guess Isabel is getting all the good stuff from my milk.
- I still can't sleep sideways due to the c section stitching and can only go out/walk a few blocks before getting so tired. Doctors says it will take 6 weeks to recover and before I can exercise.
- None of our friends can visit right now since Isabel hasn't gotten all her immunization shots yet. We are following the Asian tradition of being hermits the first months of her life

- Lei

Delivery and Hospital Stay - the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

It's been 12 days since I delivered Isabel. I figure it's just enough time to be sane again but not have motherhood amnesia yet to tell you all about my delivery and recovery experience fairly honestly and objectively.

Warning: Don't read this if you don't like graphic details. For those who have not had kids but want to, this may be more than you want to know.

The Good - let's start with the positive
- Isabel was born perfectly healthy and so adorable and I am in good health after this ordeal
- My OB (Dr. Jane Fang) was fantastic and came in to do my delivery and C section after hours even though she was not on call that day - she came after a fund raiser all dressed up but jumped right in at 9:00pm to first try vaginal delivery and then delivered Isabel at 10:15pm by C section. I was so relieved she was there
- Some of the nurses I had at the CPMC were super helpful and went above beyond to teach us how to care for baby, comfort me, and give us loot (including Cheryl, Jeanette, Tatia, Ruth Hong, June). The last two being my absolute favorites
- Hospital food was surprising good and plenty. It even included an impressive selection of chinese cuisine (Jook or congee, steamed buns, fried rice)
- My mom arrived on Sunday, May 4th and started cooking me great organic chicken soup and congee (wow, so yummy)
- Women's Health Resource Center offered Postpartum Massages for $65 an hour (no tip needed given they are a non-profit). Janet was my therapist and she was great. She came to my room. I just had another massage today at the center next to CPMC hospital
- The Epidural when working was a great relief - only mild pain and pressure - and it was fairly painless to receive it
- The nurse (Svan) who gave me the IV was great too (minimal pain)
- I had a morphine shot the night of May 1st when we first came to the hospital and they turned us away. The shot helped me sleep most of the night through the escalating labor pains. I really needed that rest to have energy for the next day
- The hospital bed is amazing and can be positioned in so many ways to provide comfort
- Most likely can do a c-section next time directly if we have a second baby and skip the whole labor thing all together

The Bad(and the Ugly) - now some not so pleasant stuff
- My Epidural stopped working after a few hours. First, I had pain in some areas so the anesthesiologist kept pumping more medicine in me at my request. That helped for a short period. When I was dilated beyond 8 cm and then 9 cm, I started feeling more pain like an alien is trying to come out of my body down there and kicking the shit out of me. I thought I wanted to die instead of have this baby after a few hours. I also thought wow, if the epidural causes this much pain, then I don't know what natural birth would be like. Well, little did I know that I was experiencing natural birth because my OB discovered at 6pm that my Epidural stopped working for a few hours already. (The worst was the nurse Mary that was helping us started out nice, but around 2pm started getting impatient and told me that I had the lowest pain tolerance she has ever known since I was complaining of pain. I was so vulnerable that I believed her when in fact she was not doing her job to realize my Epidural was starting to wane and I was experiencing full pain)
- Also had a serious groin muscle spasm while I was pushing when the medication was not working. That should have been a sign to the nurse that the epidural was not working, but again no one thought of it. The spasm was so bad, I couldn't push anymore without triggering it.
- I had a second Epidural while I was 9.5cm dilated and they pumped a lot of medicine in me. So much so, I fell asleep mid-sentence from the relief. That was the good news. The bad was that my muscle relaxed so much that Isabel's head tilted too much to come out vaginally. This is after I have already pushed for 3 + hours to try to deliver her (My OB thought she can still do it vaginally, so she used a forcep in me to try to correct her head position for about 30-45min while about 10 nurses/doctors were in the room - try to imagine that view from the southern end - luckily my second epidural worked well enough for me not to feel too much pain)
- I basically had almost a vaginal birth and major stomach surgery; so serious swelling down there (thank god no stitches) and major stomach stitches from the C section all in one.
- I had at least 2 hours of the "shakes." It was pretty uncomfortable. Imagine shaking uncontrollably all over thinking you are cold and teeth cluttering. I am told it's like a drug addict that is on withdrawl - very weird feeling as if your body is out of control
- Some shitty nurses. Not all Cmpc nurses are created equal. There are definitely plenty who are there just for the paycheck and could care less about you. One nurse gave Isabel a whole 2 oz of soy formula even though we told her to just give her enough to quiet down. She didn't listen. A few nurses keep offering me vicadin for pain relief even though I repeated told them I get nausea and don't want it.
- The lactation consultant was less helpful than some of the great nurses in teaching me how to breastfeed. I felt shitty all day on Isabel's second day when she was crying all day and I still had no milk. All sorts of inadequacy thoughts came to my mind and the nurses didn't help with that and kept pushing me to use formula because they didn't want to deal with a crying baby. At 4:40pm on May 4, we finally saw a flyer on the baby's bassinet which talked about what to expect the second day. Everything we experienced was normal. I wish someone actually gave us that flyer in the beginning of the day. No one bothered
- I was bed-ridden for 4 days in the hospital - swollen everywhere and was only able to walk two blocks 10 days after delivery. I guess that's normal for C section
- The transportation team when we left was more chatty than helpful. I tried to sit in the wheelchair and almost fell because they didn't put the break on or try to help me in. They put me at the entrance of the door where there was a wind tunnel while waiting to load. Thank god, I had a heavy coat. I could have caught a cold.
- I left my cell phone and ear piece in the hospital room when we checked out. Someone at the hospital basically took them and is now using them now. I had to buy a new phone and head set this week.

All in all, not at all what I expected. I definitely was not prepared for the natural birth pain. I can see why every woman say at some point during labor that they never want to have another baby again. It's the worse pain I have ever experienced or imagined to experience. At the end of the day, I survived as all woman do. I am so impressed how our bodies can handle this process.

I am happy to be on the road to recovery and enjoying my time with Isabel

- Lei

Isabel Playing with Grandma

When Isabel is not hungry, she plays very happily. Here is a clip with my mom after she just ate.

Wrath of Isabel

She got some lungs. This is just a short clip. She can go on for 30 minutes like that if she is hungry, has dirty diaper, or need to burp. The trick is figuring out which one it is. Most likely, she is hungry.

And Now ... Introducing ..... (drum roll please). ....ME!

Don't tell my parents, but I was pretending to take a nap. I wanted to break away from them for a few minutes to introduce myself.

My name is Isabel Mei Lapena. My parents told me that I was brought into the world on May 2nd, 2008 at 10:13pm. I was 7 lbs, 5 ounces and 21 inches (whatever this all means). Mom said that I kept her in labor for 40 hours. Well, I had to wait in her stomach for nine months in that uncomfortable position so we're even. I guess that's why I couldn't wait and decided to come one week early.

Where did I get my name? Well, let's see.

• Isabel is after Queen Isabella of Spain who sponsored the voyages of a guy named Christopher Columbus. They're supposed to be famous or something so one day I hope to meet both of them.
  
• Mei 玫 translates to "a sparkling red gem" in Chinese in respect to half of my culture. It also represents my parents' birthstone: ruby. My parents also said that to make my grandma happy, they explained it as the first chinese letter in the word "rose" (the word "rose" in Chinese is "mei gui") and this represents my dad's mom's name (Rose Marie).

So, thus my name, Isabel Mei, but you can call me Mei Mei.

So anyway, that's all I have time for now. I hear my mom coming back and I'm getting hungry. I have to start my routine of waking up, crying, eating, going potty, and sleeping. It's tough being me in this new world. Don't tell anyone this, but I'm actually starting to like it with all of the attention. I think I already have my dad wrapped around my finger. 'Nuff for now. I'll be in touch soon.

- Isabel "Mei Mei" Lapena

Spotted and in Early Labor

This can be graphic, so read at your own risk :-)

Three days ago, I started feeling like I was going to get my period. Weird feeling for someone that is 9 months pregnant until I talked to my mom. Apparently, this is the beginning of the final stage. Well, sure enough, I started spotting (brown stuff) two days ago consistently and getting much more "braxton hicks" contractions. These are sporadic false labor ones where the body is practicing for real labor.

I also had a dream two nights ago that I will be in labor on May 1. Well, guess what, I am in early labor right now. So why am I blogging, you may ask. Well, unlike the movies, labor for the first child can take anywhere from 24 to 72 hours because the body is not used to all the changes it must go through for delivery.

So surprisingly between my contractions which are now 7 minutes apart, I want to occupy myself with something to do like paying my bills, watching TV, talking to the OB nurse, and blogging.

It's so surreal that I am going to meet my daughter in the next day or so. The nurse keep telling me to wait for 5-1-1 before coming in. That is contractions every 5 min for 1 min long for at least an hour. I started this morning at 6am with contraction every 10 min for 30 seconds long and now it's around 6 or 7 min for almost 1 min long. It's not fun I must say, but there is a thing called mind over matter. I noticed that if I panic during the contractions the pain is a lot worse, but if I breathe slowly and just keep telling myself this is supposed to happen to my body, it is a bit better. Even better is if I have something else to occupy my mind like folding my laundry or writing this blog.

At first I thought I had contractions last night but I wasn't sure. Now I realize last night were still practice ones because real labor as I have now have a lot more intensity even though they seem short (less than a min) I am still able to speak a little during it, but barely and it varies in intensity although getting stronger as the day goes by. We are also watching Tivo together so that helps with the distraction.

More likely or not, we will be heading to the hospital tonight and hopefully checking in. They don't let you check in until you are 4 cm dilated (which I guess is equivalent to 5-1-1). Typically you give birth at 10 cm dilation. So far, I have been bleeding a little (brown and then pink but no massive period - thank goodness).

Whether my little girl will be arriving tonight or tomorrow is up to her. My dream a few days ago only told me that I would be in labor on May 1 before it woke me up (how strange huh?) Maybe mother's instinct is kicking in already :-)

Stay tuned in a few days for the good news (keeping my fingers crossed for a smooth labor and delivery)

-Lei